Raising a Daughter

Sextus femineus suo jungatur sexui: nesciat, imo timeat cum pueris ludere. Nullum impudicum verbum noverit; et si forte in tumultu familiae discurrentis aliquid audiat, non intelligat. Matris nutum pro verbis ac monitis et pro imperio habeat. Amet ut parentem, subjiciatur ut dominae, timeat ut magistram. Cum autem virgunculam rudem et edentulam, septimus aetatis annus exceperit, et ceperit erubescere, scire quid taceat, dubitare quid dicat: discat memoriter Psalterium, et usque ad annos pubertatis, libros Salomonis: Evangelia, Apostolos, et Prophetas sui cordis thesaurum faciat. Nec liberius procedat ad publicum, nec semper ecclesiarum quaerat celebritatem. In cubiculo suo totas delicias habeat. Nunmquam juvenculos, nunquam cincinnatos videat, vocis dulcedines per aurem animam vulnerantes, puellerumque lacivia repellantur. Quae quanto licentius adeunt, tanto difficilius evitantur: et quod didicerunt, secreto doceat, inclusamque Danaem vulgi sermonibus violant. Sit ei magistra comes, paedagoga custos: non multo vina dedita: non, juxta Apostolum, otiosa atque verbosa; sed sobria, gravis, lanifica, et ea tantum loquens, quae animum puellarem ad virtutem instituant, Ut enim aqua in areola digitum sequitur praecedentem, ita aetas mollis, et tenera in utramque partem flexibilis est, et quocumque duxeris, trahitur. Solent lascivi et comptuli juvenes blandimentis, affabilitate, munusculis, aditum sibi per nutrices aut alumnas quaerere; et cum clementer intraverit, de scintillis incendia concitare, paulatimque peroficere ad impudentiam: et nequaquam posse prohiberi, illo in se versiculo comprobato: 'Aegre reprehendas, quod sinis consuescere.' Pudet dicere: et tamen dicendum est: Nobiles feminae, quae nobiliores habuere neglectui procos, vilissimae conditionis hominibus, et servulis copulantur; ac sub nomine religionis, et umbra continentiae, interdum deserunt viros, Helenae sequuntur Alexandros, nec Menelaos pertimescunt. Videntur haec, plaguntur, et non vindicantur: quia multitudo peccantium peccandi licentiam subministrat. Proh nefas, orbis terrarum ruit, in nobis peccata non ruunt. Sanctus Hieronymus, ex Epistola CXXVIII, Ad Gaudentium

A girl should associate with her own sex, she should not know boys, indeed she should fear to play with them. She should never hear an unclean word, and if amid the bustle of the house she should hear one, she should not understand it. Her mother's nod should suffice for words and warnings and commands. She should love her as a parent, obey her as a mistress, and reverence her as a teacher. She is now a toothless raw little girl, but with seven years passing, she should take to blushing knowing what she should not say and doubtful as to what she should say. Let her learn the Psalter by heart and in the years of adolescence the books of Solomon. The Gospels, the Apostles and the Prophets should be made the treasure of her heart. She should not go out in public too freely, nor always seek out crowded churches. In her own room should be all her pleasure. She must never look at young men, never at fashionable types, and the sweet voices which wound the soul through the ears and loose behaviour of young women must be driven away. The more freedom of access such women possess, so much harder is it to avoid them and what they have learned they will teach in secret, and our secluded Dana will be violated by vulgar talk. Let her have for guardians a companion a mistress and a governess, one not much given to wine, or in the Apostle's words idle and a gossip, but sober, grave, a spinner of wool, one who will establish a girl's soul in virtue. For as water follows a finger drawn through sand, so one of soft and tender years can be bent in two ways, and wherever you lead she is drawn. It is customary for impudent and well groomed young men to seek access for themselves by nurses or dependants with blandishments, friendliness, little gifts, and when they have thus gently effected their approach they blow up fire from the sparks and little by little advance to shamelessness, and it is impossible to stop it then, the verse being proved true: 'It is ill rebuking what you have allowed to become a habit.' I am ashamed to say it and yet it must be said: noble ladies who have rejected more noble suitors join themselves to men of the lowest condition and even with slaves, and sometimes in the name of religion and under the cloak of continence they abandon their husbands, Helen follows Paris without any fear of Menelaus. These things are seen, lamented, and not punished, for the multitude of sinners grants tolerance to it. For shame, the world goes to ruin, but in us sin does not. Saint Jerome, from Letter 128, To Gaudentius

Mother and Daughter Withdraw

Ἐπεὶ οὖν ἐπαύσατο τῇ μητρὶ, ἤ τε τῆς παιδοτροφίας φροντὶς καὶ ἡ τῆς παιδεύσεώς τε καὶ καταστάσεως τῶν τέκνων μέριμνα, καὶ αἱ πλείους τῆς ὑλιοδεστέρας ζωῆς ἀφορμαὶ, εἰς τὰ τέκνα κατεμερίσθησαν· τότε, καθὼς προείρηται, γίνεται σύμβουλος τῆς μητρὸς ἡ τῆς παρθένου ζωὴ πρὸς τὴν ἐμφιλόσοφον ταύτην καὶ ἄυλον τοῦ βίου διαγωγήν· καὶ ἀποστήσασα τῶν ἐν συνηθείᾳ πάντων, πρὸς τὸ ἴδιον τῆς ταπεινοφροσύνης μέτρον μετήγαγεν· ὁμότιμον αὐτὴν γενέσθαι τῷ πληρώματι τῶν παρθένων παρασκευάσασα, ὡς καὶ τραπέζης μιᾶς, καὶ κοίτης, καὶ πάντων τῶν πρὸς τὴν ζωὴν κατὰ τὸ ἴσον συμμετέχειν αὐταῖς, πάσης τῆς κατὰ τὴν ἀξίαν διαφορᾶς ὑφαιρεθείσης αὐτῶν τῆς ζωῆς. Καὶ τοιαύτη τις ἧν ἡ τοῦ βίου τάξις, καὶ τοσοῦτον τὸ ὑψος τῆς φιλοσοφίας, καὶ ἡ σεμνὴ τῆς ζωῆς πολιτεία ἐν τῇ καθ' ἡμέραν τε καὶ νύκτα διαγωγῇ, ὡς ὑπερβαίνειν τὴν ἐκ τῶν λόγων ὑπογραφήν. Καθάπερ γὰρ αί διὰ θανάτου τῶν σωμάτων ἐκλυθεῖσαι ψυχαὶ, καὶ τῶν κατὰ τὸν βίον τοῦτον μεριμνῶν συνεκλύονται, οὕτως κεχώριστο αὐτων ἡ ζωὴ, καὶ ἀπῴκιστο πάσης βιωτικῆς ματαιότητος, καὶ πρὸς μίμησιν τῆς τῶν ἀγγέλων ζωῆς ἐῥῥυθίζετο. Ἐν οἶς γὰρ οὐ θυμὸς, οὐ φθονος, οὐ μῖσος, οὐχ ὑπεροψία, οὐκ ἄλλο τι τῶν τοιούτων ἐνεωρᾶτο· ἥ τε τῶν ματαίων ἐπιθυμία, τιμῆς τε καὶ δόξης, καὶ τύφου, καὶ ὑπερηφανίας, καὶ πάντων τῶν τοιούτων ἐκβεβλημένων. Τρυφὴ δὲ ἧν ἡ ἐγκράτεια, καὶ δόξα τὸ μὴ γινωσκεσθαι. Πλοῦτος δὲ ἧν ἡ ἀκτημοσύνη, καὶ τὸ πᾶσαν τὴν ὑλικὴν περιουσίαν, οἶόν τινα κόνιν τῶν σωμάτων, ἀποτινάξασθαι. Ἔργον δὲ τῶν κατὰ τὴν ζωὴν ταύτην σπουδαζομένων οὐδὲν, ὅτι μὴ πάρεγον. Μόνη δὲ ἡ τῶν θείων μελέτη, καὶ τὸ τῆς προσευχῆς ἀδιάλειπτον, καὶ ἡ ἄπαυστος ὑμνῳδία· κατὰ τὸ ἴσον συμπαρατεινομένη τῷ χρόνῳ, διὰ νυκτὸς καὶ ἡμέρας πάσης· ὥστε αὐταῖς καὶ ἔργον εἴναι τοῦτο, καὶ ἔργον, ἀνάπαυσιν. Τὴν τοίνυν τοιαύτην διαγωγὴν τίς ἂν ὑπ' ὅψιν ἀγάγοι λόγος ἀνθρώπινος; Παρ' οἶς μεθόριος ἧν ἡ ζωὴ τῆς τε ἀνθρωπίνης καὶ τῆς ἀσωμάτου φύσεως. Τὸ μὲν γὰρ ἐλευθερωθῆναι τῶν ἀνθρωπίνων παθημάτων τὴν φύσιν κρεῖττον ἤ κατὰ ἄνθρωπον ἧν· τὸ δὲ ἐν σώματι φαίνεσθαι καὶ σχήματι περιειλῆφθαι, καὶ τοῖς αἰσθητικοῖς ὀργάνοις συζῇν, ἐν τούτῳ τῆς ἀγγελικῆς τε καὶ ἀσωμάτου φύσεως τὸ ἔλαττον εἶχον. Τάχα δ' ἄν τις τολμήσας εἴποι μηδὲ καταδεεστέραν τὴν παραλλαγὴν εἰναι· ὅτι σαρκὶ συζῶντες, καθ' ὁμοιότητα τῶν ἀσωμάτων δυνάμεων, οὐκ ἐβαροῦντο τῷ ἐφολκίῳ τοῦ σώματος· ἀλλ' ἀνωφερής τε καὶ μετέωρος ἧν αὐτῶν ἡ ζωὴ, ταῖς οὐρανίαις συμμετεωροποροῦσα δυνάμεσι. Ἅγιος Γρηγόριος Νύσσης, Εἰς Τον Βιον Της Ὅσιας Μακρινης

When the cares of bringing up a family and concern for their education and position in life had reached an end, and the property, a frequent cause of worldliness, had been divided among the children, then, as I said, the life of the virgin became the guide of the mother for this philosophical and spiritual way of life, and drawing her mother from all accustomed behaviour, Macrina lead her to adopt her own standard of humility, inclining her to live as an equal with the staff of maids, so as to have one table and bed with them, and so in all the things of life to be an equal, being done with all differences of rank. Such was the manner of their life, and so great was the height of their philosophy, and so holy the arrangement of their lives day and night, that it surpasses verbal description. For just as souls released from the body by death are saved from the cares of this life, so was their life withdrawn from all worldly vanities and well ordered to an imitation of the angelic life. For among them there was no anger, or  jealousy, or hatred or pride, nor anything else like such things, since they had cast off all vain desires for honour and glory, all vanity, arrogance and the everything like them. Continence was their luxury, and their glory was not to be known. Their wealth was their poverty, and the casting away of all material superfluities like dust from their bodies. Of  the things eagerly pursued in this life there was not even a little concern. Nothing there was but the care of Divine things and unceasing prayer and endless hymnody, lasting as long as time itself, practised night and day, so that to them this was work and work was rest. What human speech could describe for the eye such a thing as this, a life on the cusp of human and spiritual nature? For that his nature should be free from human weaknesses is more than can be asked of man, but only by appearing in bodily form did these fall short of the angelic and immaterial nature. Perhaps some might even dare to say that the difference was not to their disadvantage, for living in the body and yet after the likeness of  immaterial beings, they were not weighed down by the burden of the body, but their life was exalted to the skies and they walked on high together with the powers of heaven. Saint Gregory of Nyssa, The Life of Saint Macrina

Educating A Girl

Fiant ei litterae vel buxae, vel eburneae, et suis nominibus appellentur. Ludat in eis, ut et lusus ejus eruditio sit. Et non solum ordinem teneat litterarum, et memoria nominum in canticum transeat; sed ipse inter se crebro ordo turbetur, et mediis ultima, primis media misceantur, ut eas non sono tantum, sed et visu noverit: cum vero ceperit trementi manu stylum in cera ducere, vel alterius superposita manu teneri regantur articuli, vel in tabella sculpantur elementa, ut per eosdem sulcos inclusa margnibus trahuntur vestigia, et foras non queant evagari. Sylabbas jungat ad praemium: et quibus illa aetas delectari potest, munusculis invitetur. Habeat et in discendo socias, quibus invideat: quarum laudibus mordeatur.  Non est objurganda, si tardior sit, sed laudibus excitandum ingenium, ut et vicisse gaudeat, et victa doleat. Cavendum in primis, ne oderit studia, ne amaritudo eorum praecepta in infantia, ultra rudes annos transeat. Ipsa nomina, per quae consuescit paulatim verba contexere, non sint fortuita, sed certa, et coacevata de industria, Prophetarum videlicet atque Apostolorum, et omnis ab Adam Patriarcharum series, de Matthaeo Lucaque descendat, ut dum aliud agit, futurae memoriae praeparetur. Magister probae aetatis et vitae, eruditionisque est eligendus, nec puto erubescet vir doctus id facere in propinqua, vel in nobili virgine, quod Aristotles fecit in Philippi filio, ut ipse librariorum utilitate initia traderet litterarum. Non sunt contenenda quasi parva, sine quibus magna constare non possunt. Ipse elementorum sonus, et prima institutio praeceptorum, aliter de erudito, aliter de rustico ore profertur. Sanctus Hieronymus, Epistola CVII, Ad Laetam Source: Migne PL 22 871-872

Let there be letters of boxwood or ivory, each called by its proper name. Let her play with these, so that even in her play there may be learning. And not only make her grasp the right order of the letters and see that she forms their names into a rhyme, but constantly disarrange their order and put the last letters in the middle and the middle ones at the beginning that she may know them all by sight as well as by sound. Moreover, so soon as she begins to use the style upon the wax, and her hand is still faltering, either guide her soft fingers by laying your hand upon hers, or else have simple copies cut upon a tablet; so that her efforts confined within these limits may keep to the lines traced out for her and not stray outside of these. Offer prizes for good spelling and draw her onward with little gifts such as children of her age delight in. And let her have companions in her lessons to excite emulation in her, that she may be stimulated when she sees them praised. You must not scold her if she is slow to learn but must employ praise to excite her mind, so that she may be glad when she excels others and sorry when she is excelled by them. Above all you must take care not to make her lessons distasteful to her lest a dislike for them conceived in childhood may continue into her maturer years. The very words which she tries bit by bit to put together and to pronounce ought not to be chance ones, but names specially fixed upon and heaped together for the purpose, those for example of the Prophets or the Apostles or the list of Patriarchs from Adam downwards as it is given by Matthew and Luke. In this way while her tongue will be well-trained, her memory will be likewise developed. Again, you must choose for her a master of approved years, life, and learning. A man of culture will not, I think, blush to do for a kinswoman or a highborn virgin what Aristotle did for Phillip's son when, descending to the level of an usher, he consented to teach him his letters. Things must not be despised as of small account in the absence of which great results cannot be achieved. The very rudiments and first beginnings of knowledge sound differently in the mouth of an educated man and of an uneducated. Saint Jerome, from Letter 107, To Laeta

Epitaph for Rhode

O Rhode, dulcis anima, acervo mihi funere rapta, qui tantum properasti matris foedare senectam senilemque aetatem tantos onerare dolores, te sine namque mihi nec lux nec vita iocunda est. quid primum tollerare queam, tua dum singula quaero, cum venit in mentem quod tuorum tu decus omnium esses? quid pudor, castus, quid sancta fides moresque benigni ingeniumque doctrinaque tua et verba sobria mente? prudens et innocua caelestia regna petisti. iam vale perpetuo dulcis et in pace quiesce. Epitaphios Rhodae

O Rhode, sweet soul, bitter to me death's strike, Which only sped the ravages of a mother's old age, And senility with such heavy grief, For without you there is no joy in light or life. What can I endure first, when I ponder your uniqueness, When it comes to mind that you gloried in everything? Your modesty, chastity, your holy conduct Your teaching and words from a steady mind? Wise and innocent you have sought the celestial kingdom. Now, farewell, sweet one, rest in perpetual peace. Epitaph for Rhode

Epitaph for Granddaughters

Lumine virgineo hic splendida membra quiescunt. Insigneis animo, castae velamine sancto Crinibus imposito caelum petiere sorores Innocuae vitae meritis operumque bonorum. Noxia vincentes Christo medicante venena Invisi anguis palmam tenuere perennem, Aspide calcato sponsi virtute triumphant Letanturque simul pacata in secula missae Evictis carnis vitiis, saevoque dracone Obluctante diu subegunt durissima bella. Nam cunctis exuta malis hic corpora condunt. Tantus amor tenuit semper sub luce sacratas, Iungeret ut tumulo sanctarum membra sororum. Alvus quas matris mundo emiserat una, Ad caelum pariter mittet domus una sepulcri. Mirifico genetrix fetu, quae quattor agnas Protulit electas, claris quae quattor astris Emicuit castoque choro comitante Maria Letatur gradiens germanis septa puellis. Ingressae templum domini venerabile munus Accepient, duros quoniam vicere labores, Floribus et variis operum gemmisque nitentes Lucis perpetuae magno potientur honore. Adventum sponsi nunc praestolantur ovantes Veste sacra comptae, oleo durante beatae. Immortale decus numerosa prole parentes Aeterno regi fidei pietate sacrarunt. nomina sanctarum lector is forte requiris, ex omni versu te littera prima docebit. hunc posuit neptes titulum Taurina sacrata. Epitaphius Neptibus

Limbs splendid here in virginal splendor rest. In souls noble, on hair rest Chaste veils, sisters who sought heaven In innocent life's merits and good works. Noxious poison of the hated snake conquering, In the healing of Christ they sought the deathless palm, A serpent trampled, the groom's virtue triumphant. Let these sent together into the age rejoice, Evicting faults of flesh and dragon's ferocity Overcome through hard and long battles, No evil's stay permitting, here their bodies they brought. These consecrated ones had such love always so that In one tomb are the bodies of sacred sisters. A single mother's womb sent them into the world, A single tomb sends them to heaven together. Marvellous how a fertile mother four elect lambs Produced, these four bright stars, Eminent Maria who in the chaste chorus is gathered. Let her rejoice walking with her begotten offspring, Let them enter the Lord's Temple with venerable gifts, All acceptable, for with hard labour they were won, Flowers and various gems shining are their deeds, Let them obtain great honour in the eternal light. Advent of the groom they now await to celebrate Vestments sacred their garb, with blessed oil anointed. Immortal offspring, glory of parents, All dedicated to the eternal king with faith and piety. If, reader, you seek the names of these blessed ones, Learn it from the first letter of every line. The consecrated Taurina made this for granddaughters. Epitaph for Granddaughters

Epitaph for Paulina

Paulina hic posita est clarissima femina mater quae meruit miserante deo ut funus acerbum nesciret natae, quae mox in pace secuta est. Epitaphios Paulinae

Here is placed Paulina, an eminent woman and mother, Who merited by the mercy of God that she would not know The bitter funeral of a daughter, she who soon followed her into peace. Epitaph for Paulina

Epitaph for Maria

Sanctorum gremiis commendat Maria corpus casta gravis sapiens clemens moderata quieta, claram sublimis fudit quam partus in auras, sed placitura deo generis superavit honorem haec non mortales, sed virginitatis amore aeternos sortita toros Christiq. petivit perepetuam  lucem, nullo quae fine tenetur. tertius et decimus gaudens hanc viderat annus, conposuit corpus, caelum cum laeta petivit. texerat haec sacros casto velamine crines, sed Christum festina petit mundumq. reliquit. Epitaphios Mariae

Into the lap of the saints Maria commends her body, Chaste thoughtful wise kind moderate and quiet, She who born brought with her great light, But being pleasing to God, her family's honor surpassing, Not with mortal but with love of virginity The eternal wedding chamber of Christ she chose, And sought the light perpetual, which without end she might obtain. This happy one, seeing thirteen years, Composed her body and sought heaven with joy. Covering her sacred hair with a chaste veil She swiftly sought Christ and the world abandoned. Epitaph for Maria

Epitaph for Artemia

Hic icaet Artemia, dulcis aptissimus infans et visu grata et verbis dulcissima  cunctis quattor in quinto ad Christum detulit annos, innocens subito ad caelestia regna transivit. Epitaphios  Artemiae

Here lies Artemia, a sweet most fitting child, A grace to see and with sweet words for all. Four years going on five to Christ She was taken, An innocent suddenly to the celestial realm transported. Epitaph for Artemia

Epitaph for Felicia

Aspicite venientes hic mea membra sepulta: hic recubo felix parba etate peremta. Felicia mici nomen est ex progenie ductu, octavo etatis in saeclo gesseram anno. dulcis eram patri et garrula matri, serbis eram leta, tota me leta ferebam. non vitium mors, consuetudo propria natis, virginio iam cetu nunc letior adsto. ultime cum dominus totum concusserit orbem, tunc cineres isti mundo pereunte resurgent. Epitaph for Felicia

See, you who come, here my members buried; Here I rest happy in young age cut off. Felicia my name, from my lineage drawn, Eight years of age I attained. Sweet I was to father, a chatterbox to mother, A joy to servants, all bore me gladly. No fault is death, it is the proper way of those born; And a virgin I wait more joyfully in the whale Until at last the Lord strikes the whole earth And these ashes, as the world perishes, rise. Epitaphios Feliciae

Some Dangers Of Asceticism

Novi apud te, et apud matrem tuam, superbiam, per quam diabolus cecidit, penitus locum non habere. Unde ad te super ea scribere superfluum sit. Stultissimum quippe est docere, quod noverit ille quem doceas. Sed ne hoc ipsum tibi jactantiam generet, quod saeculi jactantiam contempsisti; ne cogitatio tacita subrepat, ut quia in auratis vestibus placere desisti, placere coneris in sordidis: et si quandum in conventum fratrum veneris vel sororum, humilies sedeas, scabello te causeris indignam. Vocem ex industria, quasi confecta jejuniis, non tenues; et deficientis imitata gressum, humeri innitaris alterius. Sunt quippe nonnullae extrerminantes facies suas, ut appareant hominibus jejunantes: quae statim ut aliquem viderint, ingemiscunt, demittunt supercilium, et operta facie, vix unum oculum, liberant ad videndum. Vestis pulla, cingulam saccum, et sordidis manibus pedibusque, venter solus, quia videri non potest, aestuat cibo. His quotidie Psalmus ille canitur: Dominus dissipabit ossa hominum sibi placentium.  Sanctus Hieronymus, Epistola XXII, Ad Eustochium, Paulae Filiam Source: Migne PL 22 413

I know that neither to you nor your mother may be attributed pride, that which through which the devil fell. It would be superfluous to write to you upon it; for it is most stupid to teach someone something he knows. But do not become boastful now that you have despised the boastfulness of the age. Do not harbor the secret thought that having ceased to court attention in golden garments you may do so in poor attire. If you come into a gathering of brothers or sisters, do not sit in too low a place or announce that you are unworthy of a footstool. Do not roughen your voice as if exhausted by fasting, nor mimic the gait of one who is faint while leaning on another's shoulder. Some women indeed disfigure their faces that they may appear to men to fast, and as soon as you catch sight of any one of them they groan, they cast their eyes down, they cover their faces, but for one eye, of course, which must be kept free to peep around. Plain attire they have, a girdle of sackcloth, unwashed hands and feet; the stomach alone, that which one cannot see, is rich with food. Of these the psalm is sung daily: 'The Lord will scatter the bones of those who please themselves.'1 St Jerome, from Letter 22, To Eustochium daughter of Paula 1 Ps 52.6

Letter To A Daughter

Dilecetissime filiae Abrae Hilarius in Domino salutem. Accepi litteras tuas, in quibus intelligo desiderantem te mei esse et certe ita habeo. Sentio enim quantum praesentia horum qui amantur optabilis sit. Et quia gravem tibi esse absentiam meam scirem, ne me forte impium esse erga te existimares, qui tam siu a te abessem: excusare tibi et profectionem mean et mora volui, ut intelligeres me non impie tibi, sed utiliter deesse. Namque cum te, filia, ut unicam, ita, quantum a me est, et unanimem habeam; vellem te puclherimam omnium et sanissimam vivere. Nuntiatem ergo mihi est, esse quemdam iuvenem, habentem margaritam et vestem inaestimabilis pretii: quam si quis ab eo posset mereri, super humanas divitias et salutem et dives et salvus fieret. Ad hunc his auditis profectus sum: ad quem cum per miltas et longas et difficiles vias venissem, videns eum statim procidi. Adest enim tam pulcher iuvenis, ut ante comspectum eius nemo audeat consistere. Qui ubi me procidisse vidit, interrogari me iussit quid vellem, et quid rogarem: et ego respondi, audisse e de veste sua et margarita, et ob id venisse; et si eam mihi dignaretur praestare, esse mihi filiam quam vehementer diligerem cui hanc vestem atque margaritam quaererem. Et inter haec prostratus in faciem fleo plurimum, et noctibus et diebus ingemiscens, rogo uti audire dignaretur precem meam. Post quae, quia bonus est iuvenis ey melius illo nihil est, ait mihi, nosti hanc vestem atque hanc margaritam, quam a me lacrymis rogas uti eam filiae tuae concedam? Et ego respondi illi, Domine, auditu cognovi de ipsis, et fide credidi: et scio quia optimae sunt, et salus vera est hac veste uti, et hac margarita ornari. Et statim minstris suis praecepit, ut mihi et vestem hanc et margaritam ostenderent: et confestim ita fit. Ac vestem primo vidi: vidi, filia, vidi quod eloqui non possum. Numquid non sericum secundum subtilitatem eius spartum erat? Numquid candori eius nives comparatae non nigrescebant? Numquid aurum iuxta fulgorem eius non lividatur? Ipsa enim multicolor, et nihil prorsus comparatum ei poterat aequari. Post quam vidi margaritam: qua visa statim concidi. Non enim potuerunt oculi mei sustinere tantum eius colorem. Nam nec coeli, nec lucis, nec maris, nec terrae species pulcritudini eius poterat comparari. Et cum prostratus iacerem, ait mihi quidam de assistentibus, Video te sollicitum et bonum patrem esse, et hanc vestem atque hanc margaritam ad filiam tuam desiderare: sed ut magis desideres, ostendo tibi quid adhuc haec numquam tineis comeditur, non usus atteritur, non sorde inficitur, non vi scinditur, non damno amittitur: sed semper talis qualis est permanet. Margaritae vero haec virtus est, ut si quis eam induerit, non aegrotet, non senescat, non moriatur. Nihil omino in se habet, quod sit noxium corpori: sed utenti ea nihil accidit, quod aut mortem afferat, aut aetatem demutet, aut impediat sanitatem. Quod ubi audivi, filia, exanimari magis desiderio margaritae et vestis istius coepi: et sicut prostratus iacebam, indeficienti fletu et intenta oratione iuvenem precari coepi, dicens: Domine sancte, miserere preci meae, et miserere sollicitudini et vitae meae. Si enim hanc vestem mihi et margaritam non concedis, miser futurus sum, filiamquae meam viventem perditurus: ego propter hanc vestem et margaritam peregrinari volo. Scis, Domine, quia tibi non mentior. Post quam vocem mean audivit, iubet me levare; et ait mihi, moverunt me preces et lacrymae tuae et bene est quod hoc credisiti. Et quia dixisti, et pre hac margarita ipsam vitam tuam velle impendere, non possum eam tibi negare: sed scire debes propositum et voluntatem meam. Vestis, quam ego dedero, talis est, ut si quis voluerit veste alia colorata et serica et aurata uti, vestem meam capere non possit. Sed illi dabo eam, quae contenta sit, non serico habitu, sed nativis coloribus et insumptuoso textu vestiri: ita ut propter consuetudinem, purpuram perangustam vestis habeat: non etiam purpura ipsa diffundatur in vestem. Magarita vero, quam a me petis, naturae eius est, ut habere eam nemo possit, qui margaritam aliam habuerit: quia aliae margaritae aut de terra aut de mari sunt; mea autem, ut ipse tu vides, speciosa et pretiosa est, incomparabilis et coelestis est, nec dignatur ibi esse ubi aliae sunt. Non enim rebus meis convenit cum rebus hominis: quia qui veste mea et margarita utitur, in aeternum sanus est; non febre exardescit, non velneri patet, non annnis demutatur, non morte dissolvitur; aequalis enim semper et aeternus est. Ego tamen hanc vestem et hanc margaritam meam petenti tibi dabo, ut eam filiae tuae perferas. Sed prius scire debes quid velit filia tua. Si se huius vestis et margaritae meae dignam faciat, id est, si vestes sericas at auratas et infectas habere noluerit, si omnem margaritam alteram oderit; tunc haec quae me rogas tibi praestabo. Post quam vocem, filia, laetus exsurgo, et secretum hoc habens, hanc ad te epistolam feci: rogans te per multas lacrymas meas, ut te huic vesti et margaritae reserves, neque miserum senem tali damno tuo facias, si hanc vestem et hanc margaritam non habueris. Saint Hilarius Pictaviensis, Ad Abram Filiam Suam Source: Migne PL 10.549a-551b

Hilary to a most delightful daughter Abra, greetings in the Lord. I have received your letter in which I understand your desire to be with me and I think likewise. I feel indeed that the presence of those who are loved is desirable. And because I know my absence is a grave matter to you, lest you judge me to act impiously against you, I should offer some excuse for my delay, that you understand that I do not treat you so, but lack greater ability. For with you daughter, as my only one, so much more it is to me that I act in harmony with you. It was announced to me that there was a certain youth who had a pearl and most precious cloth, which if someone was able to merit, would make him most rich and secure above human wealth and health. Hearing about it I went off for it and I came to it by many long and difficult roads, and seeing it I fell prostate. There was there a youth so fair that before his face no one could stand. This one who saw I had come, questioned me about why I had done so and what I had to ask, and I answered that I had heard about the cloth and pearl and that because of them I had come; and if I were worthy to be in their presence that I would love my daughter all the more, for it was for her that I sought this cloth and pearl. And while saying this I was prostrate and weeping many tears, and night and day I groaned, asking that my prayer was worthy to be heard. After these things, because the youth is good and that there is no better, he said to me, 'With many tears you ask that I yield this our cloth and this our pearl to your daughter?' And I replied to him, 'Lord, having heard about these things, and with trusting faith, I know that they are the best and that true security is given by this cloth used and by adornment with this pearl.' Instantly he ordered his servants to show me the cloth and the pearl and immediately it was done. The cloth I saw first. I saw, daughter, I saw that of which I am not able to speak. Has silk ever been woven with such skill? Compared to it would snow not be black? Would not gold beside it by dull in its lustre? It was multicolored and nothing could be its equal. After that I was shown the pearl and on seeing it I fell down. My eyes were not able to sustain its hue; neither the sky nor light nor the sea nor any pleasant sight on earth could be compared to it. Having thrown myself down, one of the assistants said to me, 'I see you wish to be a caring and good father and that you desire this cloth and pearl for your daughter, but that you desire it more, I will show to you the good of this cloth and pearl. This cloth no moth consumes, no use wears, non dirt stains, no violence tears, no damage destroys, but it remains always as it is. This pearl in truth is virtue, that if she wear it, she shall not sicken, nor grow old, nor die. Nothing it has in it that may harm the body, but by its use such things do not happen, not death, not age, and health never fails.' When I had heard this, my daughter, with my whole soul I greatly desired the pearl and cloth, and prostate as I was, with tears I began to beg the youth, saying, 'Holy Lord, be merciful to my prayer and have mercy on my anxious life. If you will not give this cloth and pearl, I shall be most wretched and my living daughter will perish. On account of this cloth and pearl I have flown along in my travels. You know, Lord, that I do not lie to you.' After he had heard my voice, he ordered me to rise up, and he said, ' Your prayers and tears have moved me and good it is that you have believed. And because you said that you would endanger your own life for this pearl, I am not able to refuse it, but you should know my command and my will. The cloth which I shall give is of such a sort that if you wish to give it some other hue, even silk or gold, it cannot be done. I shall give it to one who is not pleased with silk but with natural color and to be clad in plain garb, for on account of its nature, the cloth must through suffering become purple and not by any other means may it be coloured. The pearl which you seek from me is of such a nature that no one may possess it who would have another pearl, for other pearls are of the earth or the sea but mine, which you see to be most beautiful and precious, is of the sky, and so it is peerless and no other is worthy of it. My ways do not fit with the ways of men, for he who wears my cloth and pearl, forever they are well, no fever burns them, no wound do they suffer, the years do not change them and death does not destroy them; forever and eternally they are. Yet I shall give to you this cloth and pearl which you seek from me that you present them to your daughter, but before that you should know what your daughter wishes. If she is worthy of this cloth and pearl, if garments of silk and gold she does not wish to have and every other pearl she despises, then I shall give you what you ask.' With this said, daughter, I rose up joyfully, and this secret knowing, I wrote you this letter, asking you though many tears that you choose this cloth and pearl, lest you make an old man miserable by your loss, lacking such cloth and pearl. Saint Hilary of Poitiers, from Letter to Abra his daughter