Letter To A Daughter

Dilecetissime filiae Abrae Hilarius in Domino salutem. Accepi litteras tuas, in quibus intelligo desiderantem te mei esse et certe ita habeo. Sentio enim quantum praesentia horum qui amantur optabilis sit. Et quia gravem tibi esse absentiam meam scirem, ne me forte impium esse erga te existimares, qui tam siu a te abessem: excusare tibi et profectionem mean et mora volui, ut intelligeres me non impie tibi, sed utiliter deesse. Namque cum te, filia, ut unicam, ita, quantum a me est, et unanimem habeam; vellem te puclherimam omnium et sanissimam vivere. Nuntiatem ergo mihi est, esse quemdam iuvenem, habentem margaritam et vestem inaestimabilis pretii: quam si quis ab eo posset mereri, super humanas divitias et salutem et dives et salvus fieret. Ad hunc his auditis profectus sum: ad quem cum per miltas et longas et difficiles vias venissem, videns eum statim procidi. Adest enim tam pulcher iuvenis, ut ante comspectum eius nemo audeat consistere. Qui ubi me procidisse vidit, interrogari me iussit quid vellem, et quid rogarem: et ego respondi, audisse e de veste sua et margarita, et ob id venisse; et si eam mihi dignaretur praestare, esse mihi filiam quam vehementer diligerem cui hanc vestem atque margaritam quaererem. Et inter haec prostratus in faciem fleo plurimum, et noctibus et diebus ingemiscens, rogo uti audire dignaretur precem meam. Post quae, quia bonus est iuvenis ey melius illo nihil est, ait mihi, nosti hanc vestem atque hanc margaritam, quam a me lacrymis rogas uti eam filiae tuae concedam? Et ego respondi illi, Domine, auditu cognovi de ipsis, et fide credidi: et scio quia optimae sunt, et salus vera est hac veste uti, et hac margarita ornari. Et statim minstris suis praecepit, ut mihi et vestem hanc et margaritam ostenderent: et confestim ita fit. Ac vestem primo vidi: vidi, filia, vidi quod eloqui non possum. Numquid non sericum secundum subtilitatem eius spartum erat? Numquid candori eius nives comparatae non nigrescebant? Numquid aurum iuxta fulgorem eius non lividatur? Ipsa enim multicolor, et nihil prorsus comparatum ei poterat aequari. Post quam vidi margaritam: qua visa statim concidi. Non enim potuerunt oculi mei sustinere tantum eius colorem. Nam nec coeli, nec lucis, nec maris, nec terrae species pulcritudini eius poterat comparari. Et cum prostratus iacerem, ait mihi quidam de assistentibus, Video te sollicitum et bonum patrem esse, et hanc vestem atque hanc margaritam ad filiam tuam desiderare: sed ut magis desideres, ostendo tibi quid adhuc haec numquam tineis comeditur, non usus atteritur, non sorde inficitur, non vi scinditur, non damno amittitur: sed semper talis qualis est permanet. Margaritae vero haec virtus est, ut si quis eam induerit, non aegrotet, non senescat, non moriatur. Nihil omino in se habet, quod sit noxium corpori: sed utenti ea nihil accidit, quod aut mortem afferat, aut aetatem demutet, aut impediat sanitatem. Quod ubi audivi, filia, exanimari magis desiderio margaritae et vestis istius coepi: et sicut prostratus iacebam, indeficienti fletu et intenta oratione iuvenem precari coepi, dicens: Domine sancte, miserere preci meae, et miserere sollicitudini et vitae meae. Si enim hanc vestem mihi et margaritam non concedis, miser futurus sum, filiamquae meam viventem perditurus: ego propter hanc vestem et margaritam peregrinari volo. Scis, Domine, quia tibi non mentior. Post quam vocem mean audivit, iubet me levare; et ait mihi, moverunt me preces et lacrymae tuae et bene est quod hoc credisiti. Et quia dixisti, et pre hac margarita ipsam vitam tuam velle impendere, non possum eam tibi negare: sed scire debes propositum et voluntatem meam. Vestis, quam ego dedero, talis est, ut si quis voluerit veste alia colorata et serica et aurata uti, vestem meam capere non possit. Sed illi dabo eam, quae contenta sit, non serico habitu, sed nativis coloribus et insumptuoso textu vestiri: ita ut propter consuetudinem, purpuram perangustam vestis habeat: non etiam purpura ipsa diffundatur in vestem. Magarita vero, quam a me petis, naturae eius est, ut habere eam nemo possit, qui margaritam aliam habuerit: quia aliae margaritae aut de terra aut de mari sunt; mea autem, ut ipse tu vides, speciosa et pretiosa est, incomparabilis et coelestis est, nec dignatur ibi esse ubi aliae sunt. Non enim rebus meis convenit cum rebus hominis: quia qui veste mea et margarita utitur, in aeternum sanus est; non febre exardescit, non velneri patet, non annnis demutatur, non morte dissolvitur; aequalis enim semper et aeternus est. Ego tamen hanc vestem et hanc margaritam meam petenti tibi dabo, ut eam filiae tuae perferas. Sed prius scire debes quid velit filia tua. Si se huius vestis et margaritae meae dignam faciat, id est, si vestes sericas at auratas et infectas habere noluerit, si omnem margaritam alteram oderit; tunc haec quae me rogas tibi praestabo. Post quam vocem, filia, laetus exsurgo, et secretum hoc habens, hanc ad te epistolam feci: rogans te per multas lacrymas meas, ut te huic vesti et margaritae reserves, neque miserum senem tali damno tuo facias, si hanc vestem et hanc margaritam non habueris. Saint Hilarius Pictaviensis, Ad Abram Filiam Suam Source: Migne PL 10.549a-551b

Hilary to a most delightful daughter Abra, greetings in the Lord. I have received your letter in which I understand your desire to be with me and I think likewise. I feel indeed that the presence of those who are loved is desirable. And because I know my absence is a grave matter to you, lest you judge me to act impiously against you, I should offer some excuse for my delay, that you understand that I do not treat you so, but lack greater ability. For with you daughter, as my only one, so much more it is to me that I act in harmony with you. It was announced to me that there was a certain youth who had a pearl and most precious cloth, which if someone was able to merit, would make him most rich and secure above human wealth and health. Hearing about it I went off for it and I came to it by many long and difficult roads, and seeing it I fell prostate. There was there a youth so fair that before his face no one could stand. This one who saw I had come, questioned me about why I had done so and what I had to ask, and I answered that I had heard about the cloth and pearl and that because of them I had come; and if I were worthy to be in their presence that I would love my daughter all the more, for it was for her that I sought this cloth and pearl. And while saying this I was prostrate and weeping many tears, and night and day I groaned, asking that my prayer was worthy to be heard. After these things, because the youth is good and that there is no better, he said to me, 'With many tears you ask that I yield this our cloth and this our pearl to your daughter?' And I replied to him, 'Lord, having heard about these things, and with trusting faith, I know that they are the best and that true security is given by this cloth used and by adornment with this pearl.' Instantly he ordered his servants to show me the cloth and the pearl and immediately it was done. The cloth I saw first. I saw, daughter, I saw that of which I am not able to speak. Has silk ever been woven with such skill? Compared to it would snow not be black? Would not gold beside it by dull in its lustre? It was multicolored and nothing could be its equal. After that I was shown the pearl and on seeing it I fell down. My eyes were not able to sustain its hue; neither the sky nor light nor the sea nor any pleasant sight on earth could be compared to it. Having thrown myself down, one of the assistants said to me, 'I see you wish to be a caring and good father and that you desire this cloth and pearl for your daughter, but that you desire it more, I will show to you the good of this cloth and pearl. This cloth no moth consumes, no use wears, non dirt stains, no violence tears, no damage destroys, but it remains always as it is. This pearl in truth is virtue, that if she wear it, she shall not sicken, nor grow old, nor die. Nothing it has in it that may harm the body, but by its use such things do not happen, not death, not age, and health never fails.' When I had heard this, my daughter, with my whole soul I greatly desired the pearl and cloth, and prostate as I was, with tears I began to beg the youth, saying, 'Holy Lord, be merciful to my prayer and have mercy on my anxious life. If you will not give this cloth and pearl, I shall be most wretched and my living daughter will perish. On account of this cloth and pearl I have flown along in my travels. You know, Lord, that I do not lie to you.' After he had heard my voice, he ordered me to rise up, and he said, ' Your prayers and tears have moved me and good it is that you have believed. And because you said that you would endanger your own life for this pearl, I am not able to refuse it, but you should know my command and my will. The cloth which I shall give is of such a sort that if you wish to give it some other hue, even silk or gold, it cannot be done. I shall give it to one who is not pleased with silk but with natural color and to be clad in plain garb, for on account of its nature, the cloth must through suffering become purple and not by any other means may it be coloured. The pearl which you seek from me is of such a nature that no one may possess it who would have another pearl, for other pearls are of the earth or the sea but mine, which you see to be most beautiful and precious, is of the sky, and so it is peerless and no other is worthy of it. My ways do not fit with the ways of men, for he who wears my cloth and pearl, forever they are well, no fever burns them, no wound do they suffer, the years do not change them and death does not destroy them; forever and eternally they are. Yet I shall give to you this cloth and pearl which you seek from me that you present them to your daughter, but before that you should know what your daughter wishes. If she is worthy of this cloth and pearl, if garments of silk and gold she does not wish to have and every other pearl she despises, then I shall give you what you ask.' With this said, daughter, I rose up joyfully, and this secret knowing, I wrote you this letter, asking you though many tears that you choose this cloth and pearl, lest you make an old man miserable by your loss, lacking such cloth and pearl. Saint Hilary of Poitiers, from Letter to Abra his daughter