A Bad Report

Sed cum contemplantur eos qui nuper cuncta quae mundi sunt, cum magno fervore contempserant, nunc ad saecularium negotiorum turbinem inhianter redigi, et in ejusdem, quam evaserant, coenosa volutabri faece versari, stupor mirantibus oritur, suspirium ab imis visceribus trahitur, et in eorum mentibus desperatio generatur. In semetipsum namque unusquisque hujusmodi querelam deponit, dicens: Vae, vae, ubi ego propriae salutis spem posui? Cur autem capitis mei periculo ad ordinem illum transire decrevi? Paulo minus brevi puncto corpus simul et animam perdidi. Pene me in ignem apertis oculis propria voluntate conjeci. Quis enim illo ferventior aliquando monasterium petiit? Quis, ut videbatur, animosiori constantia ad Christi militiam properavit? Nunc autem omnium, quae promisit, oblitus, in terrenis se negotiis jugiter versat, saeculum tractat, saeculum spirat: et quem mihi mortificationis habitus dissimiliter vivit. Plane, ut perspicuum est, mutare corpus exteriorem speciem potuit, sed mens in eo, quo fuerat statu, male fixa permansit. Quid mihi conversionis ejus incentores accusare? In rebus siquidem bellicis solummodo commilitonem perdidi, sed in reliquis terrenis actibus socium non amisi. Mecum certe forenses lites agitat, mecum in tribulalibus judicum perorare non cessat, mecum importunus atria principum penetrat, mecum simul eorum auribus consilia terrenae profunditatis instillat. Sanctus Peter Damianus, De Contemptu Saeculi, Caput X Source: Migne PL 145.260d-261b

But when they observe those who have recently been cleansed of everything, they are contemptuous of them with great passion now that they have been driven back lusting into the storm of worldly affairs, and when they see them rolling about in what they should avoid as in the filthy swill of a sty, with wonder their mouths gape, and they gasp from the depths of their soul, and in their minds despair is generated. For in himself, as if giving up in a struggle, he says, 'Alas, alas, where shall I find my own salvation? Why would I escape peril by entering that order? In a moment both body and soul will be destroyed together. Certainly by my own will I should cast myself into the fire with open eyes. Who indeed more fervently than him at any time sought a monastery? Who, so it seemed, with more zeal hastened to be a soldier of Christ? Now indeed all the things which he vowed are forgotten while he is embroiled in worldly business, grasping at transient things, desiring the world, he whom mortified does not live differently from me. Certainly it is easy to change the outward appearance of the body, but in the soul he remains fixed in the evil state he was in. Why should I not find fault with the guides of his conduct? I have lost alone a fellow soldier in strife, but in the rest of earthly deeds I have not lost a friend. With me he pursues cases in court, with me he does not cease to give speeches for the judgement of the magistrates, with me he pushes into the courtyards of princes, with me he instills worldly counsels deeply into their ears.' Saint Peter Damian, On Contempt For The World, Chapter 10